Jeffrey Luk's Blog

  In the summer of 2022, I was attending an EMT class, and failed out during a practical exam.  I realized that I had completely underestimated the difficulty – and effort – of EMT school. During the spring semester just before, I had completed the most difficult period in my life, taking 18 credit hours of classes (including my most difficult prerequisite courses yet), research, clubs, and pledging a fraternity, all at the same time.  My success overshadowed any capacity I had to doubt myself, and in doing so, I had fallen to something that I viewed as a means to an end (EMT -> Clinical Hours -> Medical school).  And more importantly, it wasn’t due to some unfair circumstance outside of my control that caused this – my work ethic and smug attitude was to blame.  Immediately after, I became restless and desperate to prove myself to my parents, who I had begged to help fund the classes. This drove me to apply to and work at two jobs, which I continued throu...

Long night walks and late night talks brought me back here again.  I realized, over the course of the semester, that I've sort of become a workaholic again. Post-semester blues are hitting and the loss of structure has sort of led to a collapse in my daily routine. I need the discipline again. I think this is why I hate going on vacation -- I feel so complacent and restless such that I am more than eager to return to my usual pace.  The semester was okay. I took 12 credits, with 2 that were physical education/gym. I skipped most of my classes, as usual. Maintained a 4.0, but it's not an achievement anymore, it's the norm. At least I was consistently working out and even discovered a new hobby - bouldering.  Made a couple mistakes. First, don't get into others' drama. No good. Don't look for more issues. Second, read carefully. Got the chess club's credit card taken away because I misused it. Okay, got over that quick. Stressful, yes, but no real consequences...